Sunday, April 15, 2012

Do you know the difference between a platonic friendship and an emotional affair? They are similar except there is sexual attraction in an emotional affair and it is kept a secret. Infidelity or unfaithfulness whether on a sexual or an emotional leve

You are dealing with a fine line between platonic friendships and an emotional affair. Both are very similar except that in an emotional affair the cheating spouse gets secretive about it and a sexual attraction is involved. If you notice either of these it is time to pull back from the friendship and work on your marriage. Being human we assume to be strong enough to distinguish between friendship and emotional dependency, and not cross that line. Ad together neglect by someone or both spouses in the marriage it is easy to let our guard down and cross that line without intending to.

The question then comes how do you know if you or your spouse is in an emotional affair. For figuring out if you are then you have to be honest with yourself so you can take it seriously. If you suspect you are then you need to start looking for answers to what is missing in your marriage and don't start playing the blame game. Do everything the same if you suspect your spouse of emotional unfaithfulness. Just remember divorce is just an end, it is never the answer to the problem. Exactly what you need to do goes into more than the scope of this article is willing to cover.

There are also signs to look for in your marriage and in the behavior of yourself or your spouse if an emotional affair is present. Many of these signs are the same as having a physical or sexual affair and are grouped into having these three characteristics to go by:

Greater emotional intimacy than in the marital relationship Secrecy and deception from the partner Sexual chemistry

Internet affairs can cause the same problems as an emotional affair. Even though there is never any meeting, and thus no physical or face to face contact. That is because there is a form of fulfillment for certain needs that belong within the boundaries of the marriage. And thus the same signs can manifest from an Internet affair and will cause just as much damage to the marriage if you let it.

Signs of Emotional Affairs:

Loss of interest in the other person Sharing emotions and opening up to others other than your spouse Separate hobbies or ministries and increasing involvement in them Attraction to someone else Friendships with another than your spouse increase Lack of intimacy and sex Both work full-time and do separate activities Separate finances (checkbooks, bank accounts, etc.) Concealing things from your spouse Wanting to impress someone else other than your spouse Are you confiding in external people as much or more than your spouse? (Including friends, family, leaders in church, etc.) A decrease in empathy and overall caring Partner secures their computer in a locked area or with passwords you don't have access to An increase of external activities One or more friends of opposite sex It seems that The Bad in The Marriage Outweighs The Good And increase of friends Petty arguments increase You feel like you don't have anything in common any more or lose interest One of you is no longer attracted to the other Partner spends unusually long periods of time on cell phone or computer. You Keep Things to Yourself Partner becomes secretive or defensive when questioned about their behavior Partner loses interest in relationship or family activities You Often Dream About a Life Without Your Spouse Partner stays on computer very late at night after you have retired.

If you are wondering if your spouse or you are in an emotional affair, signs of marital problems could be under your nose. The best thing to do is get with your husband or wife and get help. Professionals are expensive but can help you and your spouse figure out how to help and hook you up with counseling and family therapy.

There are also places online to seek help or find other sources of help. Blogs, forums, and web sites made up by experienced concerned web masters who help by sending content, newsletters, and online courses to help you and your spouse with emotional affairs and other marital problems. Some are free and helpful but usually can't afford support for their free services. Other online courses charge for this service but if you have questions or other issues they provide answers as part of the package.

What ever you choose it will be worth it to fix things in your marriage.

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